The Importance of Play
“There is no more intimate act than play, even sex.” - Sam Masur in Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin
How often as adults do we allow ourselves to fully be in a state of play? For some of us, we experience trauma early on in our lives that take us away from the desire or ability to play. For others of us, somewhere in our transition to adulthood, we hit an age where we become too responsible, too serious, too stressed, too busy, or too (insert whatever adult reason) to play.
We are bombarded by expectations of what it means to be an adult. These expectations come from society, family, friends, or ourselves. Regardless of the source, we feel this need to meet these expectations and wear whatever mask we are told will make us an “adult.” The problem with wearing these adult masks? They don’t allow us to be vulnerable enough to be in a state of play. When we are wearing the masks, we are not accessing our inner child, experiencing the full spectrum of emotions, or allowing creativity to flow through us - all of which are important to living a fully expressed life.
Many people come to therapy looking to “find” themselves, but the reality is, a large part of it is about remembering ourselves. Who were we before the experiences colored our lenses? Before the traumas? Before the external expectations came pouring in? Who were we in our childhood when we were able to play?
Besides reconnecting with ourselves, research has shown significant physical and mental benefits of play for adults. Adults who allow themselves to be in a full state of play have higher levels of creativity, more intense expressions of love, an increased sense of hope, more excitement and joy for life, and a higher appreciation for beauty. Play can also help reduce the effects of stress, improve our mood, increase brain functioning, and provide a general sense of wellbeing.
To be in a full state of play, we must put our walls down and take our masks off. This leads to increased vulnerability, which allows for us to be more intimate and connected to ourselves and others around us. It allows us to start uncovering our internal blueprint that was covered up by life. We begin to experience a wider range of emotions, uncover desires and joys, flow with creativity, and allow others to see deeper layers of who we are.
I encourage you to take off the adult mask, step fully into a state of play, and see what beautiful piece of yourself you uncover. Play with your partner, with your kids, with your friends, or by yourself. Go to the park, ride a bike, grab roller skates, sit on the swing, play tag, make objects with cardboard boxes, play a sport, play Barbies, play dinosaurs, play a board game, play a video game - just play.
